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英语笑话两则

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英语笑话两则

整理了两个易懂的,可以当作笑话看,也可以练习下英语,呵呵:)
引用:
Working On The Fourth Husband

A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time.

"How wonderful! But I hope you don't mind me asking what happened to your first husband?"

"He ate poisonous mushrooms and died."

"Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?"

"He ate poisonous mushrooms too and died."

"Oh, how terrible! I'm almost afraid to ask you about your third husband."

"He died of a broken neck."

"A broken neck?"

"He wouldn't eat the mushrooms."
引用:
a holiday from school
Tommy hated school and was always looking for excuses not to go.

  If he sneezed, he asked his mother to write a note saying he had a cold.

  If he had a headache, he asked his mother to take him to the doctor during school hours.

  He spent more time at home than he did at school.

  On the days that he did go to school, he looked for excuses to come home early.

  One morning he came home when the lessons were only half finished.

  His father was surprised.

  "You've come home early," he said. "Is the school closed today?"

  "No, Dad, " Tommy said - "It's open. I came home early.

  "How did you do that?" his father asked him. "What did you say to the teacher?"

  "I told her that I had a new baby brother and that I had to come home and help you . "

  "But your mother has had twins," his father said, "a boy and a girl. You've got a baby brother and a baby sister."

  "Yes, I know, Dad, " Tommy said. "I'm saving up my baby sister for next week "

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